ANAL FISSURES: How My Ass Bled & How It Healed

Oct 24, 2021

Last summer, one of the worst things that a man could possibly experience in this short beautiful world, happened to me. It involves bleeding out of your ass for a week straight. Can you guess what it was?

You guessed it! I’m talking about anal fissures. Long story short: an anal fissure is a tear in your ass. Very fun.

I’m gonna first tell you a little story time about how I got my first anal fissure, and then I’m gonna tell you what I did to heal from it.

This post is going to be explicitly gross - this is your warning. Before I start, please check out my brand new course on bottoming by clicking this link:

I remember it clear as day: I was getting ready to bottom for Ben (the hottest man alive) you know, normal weekly routine.

Made plans, had some dinner, went to the bathroom to poop and get ready at about 6 pm.

The poop felt a little different on this day. I poop twice a day, just FYI, and the poop I had in the morning felt a little off too. Super solid and hard to come out.

I was getting really freaking annoyed and I was in a rush to go, so I kind of just gave up mid-poop. Like my asshole clenched and cut my last poop in half. I know you know what I’m talking about so I’m not gonna get into it.

Anyway, so then I was just like, “I gotta go to Ben’s, I’m gonna douche right now.”

I got my enema bulb and I literally just got up and stuck it in my ass. I don’t even think I put lube on the tip or anything which is insanity - please always put lube on anything that’s going up your ass.

If I’m remembering correctly, there was still hard poop in my hole and I just pushed the un-lubed enema tip through it, and mindlessly squirted cold water into my ass in the most un-gentle way possible.

The pain was there, but it wasn’t that bad yet. At that moment, I knew that something was off with my anal area, but because I was in a rush, I just kinda tried to keep on cleaning. I made it to three rounds of douching and at that point my ass was so uncomfortable and lowkey in pain that I stopped altogether.

I didn’t want to tell Ben about this because I didn’t think he’d want to see me if he knew that I couldn’t have sex. That sounds sad, but this was mid-2020, so back in the days where he had a whole boyfriend and when 90% of our relationship revolved around sex. Sex is still a big part of it today, but much more back then.

Anyway, so I kept my mouth shut, took a shower and drove over to Ben’s place.

When I got to his place, I went straight to the couch. We talked for a bit, and at some point, I took a deep breath and was like, “hey, so uh, I gotta tell you something.”

And Ben was like, “what?”

And I was like, “So I kind of hurt myself cleaning earlier, and my ass started hurting, so like I’m down to try to bang, but it might hurt and we might have to not have sex tonight.”

I thought he was going to be LIVID but Ben literally started smiling weirdly, and immediately went, “I’m honestly impressed that you kept this from me the entire day, because you’re starting to get a little manipulative. I’m proud of you.” and started laughing and I FELT BAD BUT IT MADE ME LAUGH.

It was a big deal that I kept that detail from him because I had a feeling that he wouldn’t want to hang out if he knew I couldn’t have sex… but I still weaseled my way into his apartment anyway. Honestly, I deserved a fucking brownie.

But obviously, I was still horny. If you knew who this guy was, I assure you - you wouldn’t be able to resist. Don’t make any moves, though - I’ll literally come for you. Pun not-intended.

So then I was like, “NO BUT WE CAN STILL TRY TO BANG” and so we did. 

We did our thing - foreplay, kisses, I blew him, whatever - and then he stuck it in my ass and I think I legitimately squealed like a pig.

This was probably the second most painful sex trial time I’ve ever had. The most painful would definitely be the very first time I had sex, storytime on that on my bottoming course.

Trying to have sex hurt so bad and I literally felt like he tore apart my ass. We eventually just gave up and did other stuff and slept for the night.

Next morning, I woke up and went to the bathroom as usual, and uh, tell me why when I sat down on the toilet and tried to poop… I felt like I was giving birth and saw blood on the water.

It was literally so painful to poop but I had to do it?! So I did, bleeding with every poop pebble that fell down and when I wiped my ass, it was redder than the flags I saw throughout my relationship with Ben.
Just kidding.

So anyway I couldn’t poop properly for the next two days. I was miserable. Like I said, I usually poop twice a day and I think I avoided food so that I wouldn’t have to go use the bathroom. Each time I went, I’d feel this excruciating pain and every single one of my poops would be accompanied with droplets of blood.

I went to the doctor’s and I had like a new doctor that I had never met before because I NEVER HAD ANAL PROBLEMS.

He asked me a lot of questions about my diet and about how much fiber I was having and honestly, I didn’t want him to be misled with why I had an anal fissure in the first place. Like, maybe my diet was a part of it, but come on now… this was from improper douching and from trying to have sex with a cut in my ass.

So I told the doctor that I was getting fucked in the ass like every week by a man and he’s like this old traditional Asian dude with glasses and he like, just sighs. 

And he, disapprovingly, was like, “I’ve had straight male patients before and they would literally break up their families because they experimented with their ass and realized that they like getting banged from the back” and I was like, “okay and? Bottoming is fucking fun, man, you should try it sometime.”

Okay no I didn’t say that but I wanted to.

So then he prescribed me this anal cream and it’s basically HC/LIDOCAINE/NIFEDIPINE 2.5%/1.5%0. 

He then told me to get Easy Fiber, this like powder fiber supplement thing, from CVS, and have 3-5 spoonfuls of that mixed with water after every meal. This is so that my poop is watery and will just flow out of my ass like piss instead of me having to push it out.

He also told me to always squeeze my ass when I’m pooping, so that my hole isn’t completely open when I’m pooping - because that’ll constrict my poop and let it come out softer and thinner, which’ll cause me less pain. This helped A LOT.

Anyway, so that anal cream was horrible. It didn’t really heal my fissure, and it was like $100 with insurance. I was like, what the actual fudge.

I spent a week deeply fingering myself with that cream and taking easy fiber every 4 hours, and I was still MISERABLE a week later. 

I went back to the doctor’s and told him what was up. He prescribed me a different anal cream, this time it was Silver Sulfadiazine Cream USP 1%, and this worked WONDERS.

Also, during this doctor’s visit, I was in such a rush to go get new anal cream that I forgot that I parked on a bus zone…? And got fined $333 for it? Annoying.

SO that’s pretty much how I healed my anal fissure. I took that second cream and fingered myself deeply with it every single day in the morning and at night. Pretty much after every shower. 

After 2 weeks with this cream, I had sex for the first time since my fissure. Ben and I were both in Boston at the same time and one night, I invited him over to hang out with my friends at their place.

We didn’t plan on having sex, cause we knew that I had a fissure, but… We got horny.

So we went to the laundry room downstairs. And this was the first time I ever had sex without cleaning, but wow. Not only was I CLEAN, but I also felt so loose and prepared and I THINK IT’S BECAUSE I COINCIDENTALLY DID BOTTOMING PREP OVER THE LAST FEW WEEKS BECAUSE I HAD BEEN FINGERING MYSELF DEEPLY TWICE A DAY WITH ANAL CREAMS.

So like, that was lit.

its lit fam GIF by Justin

If you’re experiencing an anal fissure, make sure that you actually apply the cream deeply and that you find your tear and smother it with the cream. It’s gonna sting but don’t be scared, because you’re not gonna heal if your cream doesn’t touch every part of your cut.

Also, don’t forget to mix 3-5 spoonfuls of easy fiber with water about 3 times a day so that your poop isn’t solid and will flow out of your system without causing you any pain. Practice squeezing your ass when you poop, so that the hole is constricted and the poop comes out thinner and softer.

Lesson of the day is to eat fiber and NEVER rush the douching process. And to maybe not have sex or try to have sex when you know you’re kind of in pain. Don’t make the same mistakes I did, please.

In my brand new bottoming course, there are sections on what to eat and also an entire douching tutorial. Check out this link for the deets:

Thank you guys so much for reading this lovely post. I hope you enjoyed your time with me.

I love you guys, stay safe out there!

Check out my new BOTTOMING COURSE!

Everything you need to have clean, painless sex as a gay bottom.


Stay connected with me!

Join my mailing list to receive exclusive news and updates.

None of your information will be shared, I promise.

Diet Tips For Bottoms: How To Eat

Feb 09, 2022

How To Anal Douche - The Complete Guide

Feb 01, 2022

3 Facts About STDs That You Might Not Know

Nov 10, 2021